this is super good holy crap
favorite ah friendships: geoff ramsey and gavin free
gavin: “that was a good night’s sleep when i had already gone to bed and you [geoff] crashed a tiny little motor bike through my door and said ‘i got you a present’.”
so cute i’m gonna cry omfg
My Parents Need to Stop Touching My Stuff: The Musical
featuring the hit single “Put that thing back where it came from or so help me”
First Song: Close My Door All The Way
Secret track: “I Made A Long Distance Call To My Mother Just To Find Out Where The Hell She Put My Socks”
Big Group Number: I Know You Have A Favorite (It’s Not Me)
Dramatic song: That’s Not My Name, That’s The Dog’s
This is just really fucking unnecessary.
This sentence has five words.
Here are five more words.
Five-word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It’s like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety.
I vary the sentence length, and I create music.
Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony.
I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length.
And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals–sounds that say listen to this:
it is important.
- Gary Provost
- jim: hello?
- sebastian: is this a bad time?
- jim: yes of course it is, what do you want?
- sebastian: that kitten came back to our flat. i've decided you can keep it.
- jim: SAY THAT AGAIN. say that again, and know, that if you are lying to me, i will find you, and i will skin you.
- sebastian: if you don't come home with cat supplies in the next half hour i'm using it for target practice.
- jim: WAIT.
- jim: sorry, wrong day to die.
- sherlock: oh, did you get a better offer?
- jim: you'll be hearing from me, sherlock.
- jim: if you have what you say you have, i'll make you rich. if you don't, i'll make you into shoes.
- sebastian: i already have access to your bank account, and you have enough shoes. just come home before this cat pees on the rug.
- jim: i'm just trying to act cool, i'm with sherlock and john. okay they're gone. what should we name it?